I just dropped my son off at scout camp, but he’s not there as an attending boy scout. He’s there as a camp counselor. It’s his job for the summer.
This first week is “staff week” – he and the other counselors will be getting trained and getting the camp ready for the first week of real work.
I’m thrilled that he has this opportunity, at age 15, to live away from home for a time (he will be home on weekends), and to work hard, to help others, and to enjoy the outdoors.
My wife is happy too, but she’s a little worried.
Like any 15 year old, he isn’t all that great at remembering the little things.
Sure, he’ll brush his teeth, probably. But he might forget to take his meds.
He might shower, some of the time. But he likely won’t clip his fingernails or do his pushups or eat enough.
As the oldest, he’s probably gotten more attention (for good and bad) from us parents. Which likely means he’s been “taken care of” in ways that won’t help him long term.
This summer will be his chance to get better at taking care of himself.
And the fact is, we all need to learn to do this.
Because when we’re young, our parents are much better at caring for us than we are at caring for ourselves.
Parents remind us to eat our vegetables, clean our room, floss, make a plan, do hard work, go to sleep, take a shower, and so on.
Somehow, sometime, we have to figure out these things for ourselves.
And it’s often after we figure out how to do it for others.
Which is why Jordan Peterson outlines this as his second “rule for life“: Treat yourself like someone you are responsible for helping.
We already understand what it’s like to be responsible for someone or something else.
Maybe we learn first with a pet.
My son was great at caring for the fish that he had as a pet for years. He changed the water, cleaned the aquarium, fed it daily.
But his room was a mess and he didn’t eat enough. At least he showered regularly.
He cared for the fish, but not for himself.
Here’s hoping he can spend the summer caring for himself AND for the scouts.